February 7, 2013

Parental Guidance

loved and cried through this movie
so did one of the 10-year old boys who I brought with me
it was a happy-sad and a sad-happy

and it was a pathetic reflection of parenting today
rather, it was a perfect reflection of the pathetic parenting we do today

luckily, i have no movie memory (which means I can see a movie more than once because I won't remember any of the details) which means that i won't spoil anything if you haven't seen it yet

parents work so hard to be perfect parents
competition forces us to examine techniques and trainings and philosophies that would be otherwise irrelevant

we base our success on our children's abilities to achieve
and we define achievement by high test scores, getting into great schools, and being number one on the sports team

we are not the parents our parents were
we are afraid to let our children fail
to watch them move through disappointment
and to provide them the tools they might need to maneuver life 

because we might look weak 

we are experts in a field that most of received no schooling in and no prior training in
we are too vulnerable to talk about our mistakes, to ignore social trends that make no sense, or to just be present in parenting

we worry too much 
that we are not providing enough for our children
that we are making the wrong decisions for our children
that our children will miss out
that they won't find friendship
or a job
or a meaningful path through life

have we?

can we teach them what living is if we are not awakened ourselves?
can we teach them what success is if we attribute its measures to our financial status or how many vacations our family takes?
can we raise them to know what is right in the world if they do not see what is wrong?

Parental Guidance was a good movie. Hopefully, it made us all feel a bit foolish and inspired us to be conscientious in a different way, mindful in an abundant way, and to live according to values that will make a difference.


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