Mother-Life Crisis

I may be in the midst of a mother-life crisis. There are people - like myself - who live lives of introspection. We like to analyze; we like to think; we like to look at the deeper picture. Frequently, within motherhood, the opportunity to go beneath the surface is not easily entered into. One can spend countless moments contemplating and trying to make spiritual the act of motherhood - childcare, meal preparation, housecleaning, laundry, bill paying, grocery shopping... but to really go within takes time, and time is something moms often do not have a lot of.

Thus enters the Mother-Life Crisis. The ages at which my children now sit make motherhood pass by like an action movie, the scenes go from one to the next with little down time in between. Only in motherhood, there's no ending where we get up stiff-legged from sitting for so long and throw our popcorn boxes in the trash on the way out. Instead, our legs are asleep from bouncing children on them, and the garbage detail is endless as we go from meals to snacks to ripping up paper to more snacks to the next meal to the next snack to cleaning up play doh...

In motherhood, there is always a next scene. We just watch, as the film unreels, from scene to scene - responding to a crisis, a task or a responsibility. Transition or filler scenes are few and far between. I'm not sure how long it's been since I've sat on our couch for a bit of rest and relaxation. It's a "piece" in our house I look at lovingly and longingly but rarely get to actually enjoy.

Creating rhythms and control within the chaos is one of my fortes, and yet - at the same time - I watch as life unfurls around me, bringing in something else that needs attention, mastery and initiation into our family's common rhythm. Sometimes, standing in the eye of the storm is a simple task, and - at other times - it becomes more difficult.

When my exclusive self - the one that flourishes deep inside - is being neglected, the chaos on the outside becomes less manageable. There are times this cannot be prevented and the spirit within must sit patiently waiting to be nurtured and attended to. Often, the weeks pass before the time has opened up again and - it is in those long periods of time - when the mother-life crisis can strike.

In those moments, we stoop down and we wonder what it's all about. What is the purpose? How can we achieve meaning when our pinball machine has too many balls in it? Too many bright lights, loud noises, fast action and unpredictable surprises. But, eventually, we let the ball slip through the flippers and it quiets down for a moment. Such is life. The high pace might last longer than a whirl on the pinball machine, but - eventually - the pace will slow down again. We can feel like we have control of the reigns again. Life comes back to a semblance of order.

Those low moments may not occur very often, but they are forceful and should be anticipated and planned for. If you are pensive and reflective as I am, your spirit cannot take long departures from attention. For me, the stirring within develops in symptoms without. Pay attention, my body beckons me. Ever so quietly, sometimes subtly, I begin to pay attention to my inner needs. I put myself first again.

The State of Our Ecomomy*

Whether it's the radio, TV or newspaper, people everywhere are moaning about "the state of our economy". The economy reflects the wealth and resources of a country, and the conditions of our economy depend upon the careful management of available resources and the preservation of reserves.

Today on the radio, I overheard a conversation regarding the banking industry. The gentlemen on the radio show stated that they were "burning through our reserves". I'm not exactly sure what or who HE was talking about, but I started thinking about mothers.

With such an emphasis these days on "going green" and ensuring the sustainability of our resources for the future, I have a whole new approach to motherhood and the mastery of its complicated intricacies. A mother is like an economy. :) She must ensure the preservation of her resources and the maintenance of her reserves - patience, energy, innovation, and sanity, among other things.

The sustainability of mothers is, in my humble - humorous and sarcastic - opinion, a crisis of epidemic proportion. To provide for the present without compromising the ability to provide for the future is a major task for any mother.

To avoid a deficit of natural resources and the perpetuation of a successful ecomomy, it is essential for moms to plan ahead, think outside the box, and create strategies to build up reserves in the present. Preservation, sustainability, and energy crisis are all words that stand out in a mother's world.

It is time to set aside the guilt for taking time for herself and - even more so - moms need to dedicate time to figuring out what actions could help fill their reserve tanks - a commodity not needed for immediate use but readily available when required.

Our ecomomy may be in a state of crisis, but there is a lot we can do to prevent future depletions of energy... and patience... and sanity.

*it's not a misspelling