January 29, 2015

Birthdays, Einstein, and Flashcards

All year long, I have dutifully signed my daughter's homework packet to indicate that she had completed her weekly tasks.  Only last night did I realize that I had stopped reading the assignments long ago… and only last night did I realize that she was not participating in her homework assignments fully and completely. 

She was picking and choosing, as we all do.  In life, in religion, perhaps, that is okay.  In second grade schoolwork? Not so much. Practicing math facts is an important stepping stone to future levels of math.  Recording reading time in a daily log helps teachers, librarians, and parents figure out what kind of books said child likes to read - helps ensure that said child actually finishes a book and - for the teachers - shows that there is daily reading taking place - another important stepping stone to… everything else in life.

Child number four is now the first pink-ii to own flashcards - something I have avoided and spoken out against quite adamantly. I don't believe in flashcards.  Einstein didn't use flashcards (good book)  (no, seriously - a great book).  We found other ways with the boys, but girl wanted flashcards so girl got flashcards.  We didn't even make them.  It's so much easier to learn when they are shiny and laminated and all written in the same font. 

Picking and choosing is a part of life.  We pick and choose our battles.  We pick and choose what really matters.  And, sometimes, our preferences take a back seat to the choices that are best suited to our children. 

There are 310 days until my next birthday, and I am looking forward to it.  On my birthday, I can relax from motherhood.  Well, at least I could this year.  My mother in law took our children for the night.  I didn't have to make dinner, or tuck into bed, or entertain, or break up fights.  Not only that, I didn't have to answer the "Mom, where is my…";  "Mom, he is bothering me…";  or  "Mom, can I have a… " that normally pelt me at least 3 million, one hundred and ninety nine thousand, six hundred and seventy two times a day.  Literally.  I counted once.

I got to do whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted and not have to return home to a messy, destroyed-by-children house.  That was happiness.  I'm still working on how to carry that into searching for flashcards, and helping with projects when it's past my bedtime, and telling children to do something for a third time before it even registers a response, and responding to grunts and groans when I announce it's shower time, and, I'm sure the picture is clear and needs no further clarification.

Two nights ago, I looked at boy-entering-middle-school-and-better-work-on-time-management-or-homework-will-be-a-bear as I ran the glue gun when he told me to and ONLY when he told me to.  (This required 17 minutes between glue-ings for him to sit and think and measure and cut and assess) - but I looked at him and I allowed it to warm my heart and melt my frustration.  I took a deep breath and began to appreciate that we were having this moment.  Then I checked email, Facebook, and Pinterest while I waited the 17-minutes for the next moment I was to appreciate.

310 days.

Then again, there are 142 until Father's Day.  And, Father's Day is Mother's Day.  Another story for another time.





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